This morning I'm writing to you from the comfort of my couch with the two Easter baskets that the Bunny left for my son staring at me from the coffee table. Easter might be my toughest time of year. It's all I can do to not dig into the Cadbury Creme Eggs in one of the baskets (despite having one stashed away for myself anyway).
My son's three and a half. His Easters are NOT like mine were growing up. I wasn't diabetic as a kid and when I woke up Easter Sunday my mom would tell me the Easter Bunny had come and left x baskets (I think I often had five or six of them). But the bunny that came to my house liked to play games. He'd hide the baskets and I had to go find them. I think next year I'll start that tradition with Noah.
Unlike his, my baskets ...oops, he's awake. I'll be back after the little Easter Morning ritual...
Okay. As I was saying, unlike his, my baskets were overflowing with all kinds of candy. Once I discovered the nirvana that are the aformentioned Cadbury Creme Eggs and the Mini Eggs my baskets consisted almost entirely of them. My moth...I mean, the Easter Bunny probably kept the Cadbury corporation in business with my treats alone.
Things may have followed suit with my son if I hadn't become diabetic. While I don't think eating a lot of sugar will turn you diabetic (like the old wives' tale) I do know how much I struggle with sweets now after not being taught self control with them as a child. I figure that if I can keep him from developing too much of a sweet tooth now that if, God forbid, he does become diabetic then he won't struggle so badly and it might be easier for him than it is for me. And so when we meet with the Easter Bunny every year I relay these thoughts to him and he obliges by being fairly conservative on the candy in the baskets. And I limit the amount he's allowed to have at a time. My mother used to basically let me have a five course candy breakfast Easter morning. There's none of that here.
Enough talk of candy. I'm getting drool in my keyboard.
Moving on... If you've gone back and read the earlier posts at this blog's original location then you've seen me mention some news I have. My husband and I initially weren't going to tell anybody right away but remember what I mentioned about having no self control? He has the same problem. So, since nearly everybody else knows anyway...I am five weeks pregnant.
Again, if you've read the older posts you know I had a miscarriage last year. I was not in anything resembling control at the time I got pregnant but from the very beginning my BGs were amazing for me at the time...nearly always below 200. But there was worry about the viability from the first doctor's appointment and within two or three weeks we knew for sure that it wasn't a viable pregnancy and I was going to miscarry. It still took around six weeks for it to happen putting me at about 12 weeks (though because of the problems we weren't sure how far along I actually was).
My OB at the time told me that when they see a "blighted ovum" in diabetics it's usually due to uncontrolled sugar. I kind of took issue with this. He said it in a way that made me feel at fault. Plus, I've done my own research and blighted ovums are the most common cause of miscarriage and they really don't know what causes them. The best theory is that it's just a bad egg from the start. I don't doubt that my sugar COULD'VE played a role in it...certainly didn't help matters. But I find it hard to believe there was enough evidence to say my uncontrolled diabetes caused it.
I also was on a low dose ACE inhibitor to protect my kidneys at the time. I was warned that if we wanted to try to get pregnant to go off of that medication because it's known to cause birth defects and other pregnancy complications. The pregnancy was an accident and so I wasn't able to stop the med before conceiving. This seems like a more likely culprit...if there even is a reason.
Okay, back to the present. I just found out on April 4th about this pregnancy. I was 3w6d and only tested because I had dreampt during the night that I took a pregnancy test and the "pregnant" line was darker and wider than the "control" line and it extended PAST the edges of the test. lol I knew there was a strong possibility so I headed off to pee and find out. I watched it for a few seconds and it definitely didn't look like anything was going to show up so I left it on the bathroom counter while I went to do something and got side tracked for a bit. When I went back to gather it up and throw it away there was a faint line looking up at me.
I've contacted my high-risk OB and have had some tests run. My hcg and progesterone levels seemed to be right smack dab in the middle of normal range for how far along I was at the time of the tests. Last time we thought I might not be as far along as my last period put me because my hcg level was a little lower...but it did double every 48 hours so it gave us a false sense of security.
I haven't had another level run but my OB estimated that by Thursday things should have progressed enough to see on ultrasound so I will have my first appointment then and he will do an ultrasound. I'm praying for a strong heartbeat. That's when I'll be able to breathe easier as there never was a heartbeat last time.
Thankfully this time I've been much better controlled going into this pregnancy. I'm on a pump now and have gotten my A1c down from 12.6 pre-pump to 7.2 (less than two months of that was actually on the pump). My OB ran it again about 6 weeks after the last one and it's at 6.6 now. (And it can't hurt that I haven't taken the ACE inhibitor since the last pregnancy.)
I have noticed my sugar's been running a little higher now, though. I increased my basals slightly but I'm not seeing much of a difference. I'm sure I'll be tweaking rates all throughout the pregnancy, though.
So, for the time being this blog is probably going to transform into something like The Diabetes Struggle: Pregnancy Edition. Of course I'm never sure of what the next entry's going to be about so you'll just have to come along for the ride and see.